Quanta, The Liar
Quanta, The Liar had only moved into the house next to the corner business center when troubled started that lasted for over 4 years. The Gentle Giant and his family were the best known in the neighborhood. The Gentle Giant, Bird to his friends and his family, grew up in the neighborhood and had lived in the green house for a quarter of a century. When Quanta, The Liar moved in next door to the corner business center, her other neighbor was Bird. He wanted his family and neighbors to be and to feel safe. The Liar didn’t like this. Quanta, The Liar would call the authorities when the Gentle Giant would park his mobile home in front of the houses. The sheriffs would look at the complaint, scratch their heads and say, “Bird is in the right.” The polite sheriff would say. “Try and get along with your neighbor.” Quanta, The Liar sees the Gentle Giant out in the dark with a flashlight. The sheriff’s are called again. This time Quanta, The Liar lies through her teeth and says he shined the flashlight in her bedroom window. Liar, Liar, pants on fire. The Gentle Giant was only making sure his security motion detector was working properly. When the Gentle Giant parked his RV in his own backyard the sap from the over grown trees in Quanta’s yard would be sprayed onto the mobile home. “Trim your trees.” Bird tells Quanta, The Liar. “I will, maybe next week.” Not fast enough. The Gentle Giant trims the tree himself. Again the law is standing on the sidewalk while Quanta, The Liar spouts out lies. The sheriffs watch the Gentle Giant cutting the branches with a tree trimmer. “He’s in the right, Ma’am.” “Well, he called me a Bitch.” Quanta stomps her feet. The men in green uniforms walk to the backyard and tells Bird “Try and get along.” The Gentle Giant sits on a lounge chair in his front yard. It’s getting dark early because winter is almost here. Quanta, The Liar comes outside to admire her holiday decorations. “Somebody is ready for an early Christmas.” The Gentle Giant exclaims across the yards. Quanta, The Liar is up in arms. How dare Bird to acknowledge her presence. Only friends can call the Gentle Giant Bird, not you. With hands up in the air, Quanta goes berserk, cursing up a storm. Out of the gate, literally, not only is she a liar but makes a real stupid move, she charges toward the Gentle Giant with her 18 month old little boy in her arms. The Gentle Giant had had enough of The Liar’s verbal abuse, Bird stands next to the gate while Quanta, The Liar is on the sidewalk on the other side of the gate. Her child is crying from all the noise coming from his mother. The gate is the only thing between the two adults. While shifting her son to her other arm, Quanta takes a swipe at the Gentle Giant and his thick glasses fly off his face. Quanta screams obscenities loud enough to disturb the Gentle Giant’s family. His wife and son are soon on the front porch. The Gentle Giant’s wife sees Quanta, The Liar backing off. “You better control your husband.” Quanta screams, when she sees her outside. The Gentle Giant’s wife couldn’t understand why Quanta would want to behave in such a manner. “Quanta, you’re making your baby cry.” The child was scared to death. Quanta, The Liar ran back into her house. This times the family heard sirens shout out into the night. Three cop cars race to the Liar’s complaints. Quanta knows better but it’s becoming bizarre. The sheriffs talk to her inside her house. This time Quanta, The Liar tells them The Gentle Giant hit her while she stood there in front of his house with her son in her arms. Oh No. The sheriffs come into the Gentle Giants house where the smells of a good supper enhance their nostrils. The Gentle Giant’s wife stands in front of the hot stove while the sheriffs put the handcuffs on the Giants wrists. They take him to jail for assault and child endangerment. That’s because of the lies Quanta, The Liar tells the authorities. Liar, Liar pants on fire. The Gentle Giant and his family find a way to catch Quanta in her web of lies. Through the use of a police scanner that picks up phone conversations, when using a portable phone, The Gentle Giant and his family catch Quanta The Liar abusing the ninth commandment: “Though shall not bear false witness against thy neighbor.” Quanta tells her mother over the phone “Bird”. (Gosh she should quit using that name, it’s used only in friendship.) Moved his motor home towards the alley, parked his car in its place right under her bedroom window and revved up the engine. “Just to piss me off.” Quanta The Liar yells into the phone. Not true! The Gentle Giant has a potential buyer for his Ford Tempo. He revved up the engine, but he was out in the alley showing the Mexican family next door what the car was capable of doing. Quanta tells her mother over the phone she has a friend staying with her, she has a car, she can be a taxi for Quanta since Quanta’s live in boyfriend won’t let her drive the truck. Quanta The Liar says over the phone, her friend works for the cable company. She can climb the telephone poll out in the alleyway and slice into the cable for her family so they can have cable TV. “Yes.” The mother says. “Tell your friend to slice the wires that lead to the Gentle Giant’s house.” “And call the PG &E to shut off their connection.” Oh what laughter. The Gentle Giant hears listening to the scanner. They are having a good laugh on us, aren’t they? Mother says; “And while they are at it slice up the Giant’s Pot Belly Pig.” It’s summer and it’s hot. The Gentle Giant is sitting in his front yard when Quanta, The Liar, her live in boyfriend and friends drive up to their house after a day at the river. When Quanta gets out of the car, The Gentle Giant speaks up. “I bet you didn’t think I would be out here to welcome you home to your ponderosa, did you?” Nothing kind can be said to Quanta, The Liar. Obscene words come out of the Liar’s mouth. She runs into the house. This time, a sheriff, The Gentle Giants is oh so familiar with, comes up to him and talks to him while he stands on the porch. Again, it’s dinnertime and Bird’s wife watches from the hot kitchen as the sheriff handcuffs The Gentle Giant and guides him to the back of his car. Oh no! Another sheriff comes and tells the wife of the Gentle Giant that they arrested Bird for terrorist threats. Quanta, The Liar has told the authorities The Gentle Giant yelled at her telling her while she was out in front with her companions that he was going to burn her house down with her children inside. Nothing, nothing of the kind was said. Even her companions said they didn’t hear him say that. Again more bail, more court cost, this time revocation of bail and he’s back in jail for the month. This has got to stop, but it doesn’t. Quanta, The Liar keeps it up. This has disturbed The Gentle Giant so much his blood sugar goes sky high and he lands up in the hospital for two days. The Gentle Giant tells his friends what she has done. Nobody tells stories and gets the Bird in trouble. The Gentle Giant sets up his video camera to catch the comings and goings out in the street. But he didn’t catch what must have happened during the night. In the morning a friend comes by to say hello. Bird and the friend are standing on the porch when a sheriff’s car pulls up and goes up to Quanta, The Liar’s house. The friend whispers to Bird. “Oh, by the way, we took care of her car last night.” The sheriff and Quanta, The Liar goes out to the live in boyfriend’s car that is parked further up the street. The windshield is smashed and the tires have been slashed and Quanta is yelling. “Just great Bird, you better watch out for your car, it will be next.” The Gentle Giant is dumbfounded, he can’t believe his friend would do such a thing. And Quanta, The Liar thinks the worst. No witnesses to speak of. Oh, brother. The sheriff takes off after talking to Bird. The Gentle Giant tells his friend that wasn’t her car. “You vandalized the wrong car.” “Hey buddy stay away for awhile, won’t you?” Bird’s friend begs his forgiveness and leaves. The Gentle Giant goes back in the house and watches the video of what took place. From what the video showed, Quanta’s live in boyfriend can be seen walking to his car to go to work. He stops and stands next to the car. He walks back to his house with his head held down. This guy is so quiet you can’t even tell anything is wrong. Oops, here come Quanta, The Big Mouth Liar. In her bathrobe no less. She’s cussing up a storm and stomping her feet. They do have good insurance, everybody can relate to that. Of course she is on the phone all day lying to whoever will listen to her that there is a problem with the next door neighbor, The Gentle Giant and his wife are so tired of the lies Quanta tells over the phone. Quanta says over the phone to her friends she caught him at her bedroom window. “Boy he better not do it again.” “I’ll call the cops.” The Gentle Giant doesn’t feel regretful in the least. He knows Quanta, The Liar needs to sow her wild oats. The neighbors know by the company she is keeping. She is out all hours of the night while her live in boyfriend is working to pay the bills. Quanta, The Liar lets a friend she’s seeing on the sly use their pickup truck. “Sure.” “Use my boyfriends truck.” The Gentle Giant hears over the scanner. The lover of hers wants to use it to take some stuff to the dump. Quanta, The Liar lets everyone know via the telephone that her boyfriend is mad at her and he’s giving her the cold shoulder. Oh poor girl, he throws the phone at her and tells her to call somebody who gives a fuck. By the time Quanta, The Liar’s live in boyfriend is ready to kill someone, he finds out his truck is sitting in somebody’s driveway with a flat tire. The Gentle Giant and his wife are so tired of the lies Quanta tell over the phone. Her phone calls are crystal clear over the police scanner. Quanta talks to a friend at Christmas time again “My Christmas lights have been cut.” “You know who did it?” Yeah right, a lot you know. Quanta has made a lot of dope deals lately. It’s party time next door. They hear from the phone conversations a friend stopped by, left a little snort for everyone and left licitly split. Quanta says the dope must have been bunk. “Did you see how fast she left out of here?” Her friend agrees. Now for the next three days The Gentle Giant can hear Quanta tell more stories. She calls a chicken place and tells them she got sick on their bad chicken. (She’s been snorting dope and drinking that’s why her stomach hurts.) She tells a friend over the phone her live in boyfriend took her to the emergency room at the local hospital and it cost 180 dollars. (She didn’t go anywhere but she did call and ask what procedures they conduct for a stomach aliment.) It’s New Year’s Eve, Quanta, The Liar has a party to go to with her live in boyfriend. She bought a dress and is bragging about it over the phone. Quanta is on the porch when The Gentle Giant and his wife are outside enjoying their Christmas decorations and creative lighting, when he tells his wife to go put a coat on or you will freeze. His wife rushes back in the house shivering, when she hears from next door. “She’s just a scardy cat.” Oh well, a lot you know. Quanta, The Liar has a daughter, ten years older than her half brother. She’s at a friend’s house when her mother calls over there. “My dress is so gorgeous, but I let a friend see it and I left it there.” “Got to go pick it up.” “Spend the night at your girlfriend’s house, we’ll be going to a party tonight.” “Yes, mother.” “What about your dress, won’t your friend try the dress on?” “She better not!” Quanta, The Liar screams into the phone. (She must have forgotten Quanta already told her friend: “Oh by all means, try it on, see how it looks on you.”) Quanta, The Liar is furious with The Gentle Giant. His security light is too bright. Nothing but trouble all year long. For Halloween, The Gentle Giant and his son made a dummy to sit out on the front porch in a chair to scare the trick or treaters. There seems to be a bright light on between the houses. The Gentle Giant went and investigated. Quanta had put up a 200-watt bulb on her back fence and it lit up the whole side of The Gentle Giants house. Well, we’ll just have to do something about that, now won’t we? There was already a ladder up against the house, so Bird took the chair the dummy was sitting on and put it up on the roof of his house. Next he brought the dummy up and set it in the chair. “Well let’s see what else we can do.” Bird took two empty toilet paper rolls, wrapped them up in foil and put each one in the dummy’s hands, brought his arms up to his face so it would look like he was looking through binoculars. - In Quanta’s direction. Now the light was so bright, but she wasn’t going to budge. The light stayed on all night and the dummy continued to stare at her through the binoculars. Bird’s wife went across the street to see what it looked like while the evening was still light. She couldn’t stop laughing and pointed it out to the neighbors across the street on the corner house. They all laughed so hard. Some time during the twilight hours while everyone in The Gentle Giants home was sleeping, the neighbors across from Quanta’s heard the sirens and the sheriff’s helicopter hovering over The Gentle Giants house. Now what? There had been a report that there was someone or something on top of a house and it’s lit up. The helicopter hovered while the sheriffs found out what it was. The helicopter pilot says over the scanner; “There’s a body, but no body heat.” Well, there was nothing for them to do, the sheriffs knew what was going on and got a big laugh out of it. They could see that The Gentle Giant was just having a score to settle. Nothing harmed, this time. Quanta’s boyfriend left for work around 4 p.m. She left around six, telling her daughter her girlfriend and her was going to the store. Watch your brother and my friends two kids. A half-hour later Quanta, The Liar calls her daughter and asks, “How is your brother?” He’s a 4-year-old. “He’s jumping on the couch with the other kids.” “The kids are screaming.” “Where are you, mother?” The daughter is running out of patience. “You’re at a bar and you’re drinking, aren’t you?” “We’ll be back in a half hour.” Quanta explains, sheepishly. “I’ll give you 5 dollars when I come home.” She is apologetic. “Yeah, by the time you get here, you won’t even remember you said that.” Daughter is getting perturbed. Another two hours pass and Quanta’s girlfriend calls on the daughter. “We’ll be home in an hour.” “Stop at Taco Bell, I haven’t eaten all day.” The daughter complains. Daughter waits and waits and they don’t show up. Daughter calls her grandmother and says her mother went to a bar with a friend. Daughter knows her mother is drunk, she knows this by listening to her mother breath hard over the phone. (That’s not from drink little girl, that’s from crystallizing your heart smoking a crack pipe.) Grandmother is on mother’s side. “Don’t nag, watch your brother, it won’t hurt you.” “Give your mother a break once in awhile.” “You know what she has to deal with next door.” Let your mother unwind a bit.” Her live in boyfriend will be home in an hour, had to kick the guys out. She tells her host over the phone. She is sorry to have flashed the convict type space cadet, but she got so wasted. The fag asked. “Do you always stick your tongue in their ear when you’re whispering?” Did she do that? (A famous quote.) He’s not saying she did. Oh, always trying to get the girl in trouble. “Tell me the guys name that my girlfriend took home with her.” “Oh, you mean Doug?” “Yeah he was so cute.” She apologized again for flashing. “Who was that guy I flashed in front of in your garage?” What was that I smoked?” (As if she didn’t know.) Crack, says the friend. “What does that do to you?” (What? You don’t know what is making you so wired?) “It wires you, stupid girl.” All this on a Monday night the 14th of December when her live-in boyfriend is working as a machinist, working his ass off to pay the child support of who knows how many children. Quanta, The Liar better be careful her boyfriend doesn’t find out about all this. Or does he already know and is doing the same? The Gentle Giant doesn’t think so. She would be out the door fast. Quanta, The Liar is on the phone again talking to her mother. By this time The Gentle Giant has taped her conversations so he can go to court with evidence that she’s full of bologna. “Oh yes, mother, my boyfriend and I stayed up all night talking until 4am then we went to bed.” (Yeah, right one of these days your lies will catch up to you.) “Oh mother, guess what.” “My neighbor across the street came over and gave me a Christmas card, and I put presents on her porch for her children, my other neighbor came over and asked how this girl was doing, nobody had seen you out of the house.” “I’m going to burn her car, she thinks we are friends, well, I’ll show her.” “Before I leave here her car will be burned.” “That’s for being friends with Bird.” That was enough for The Gentle Giant. He took the tape across the street and let the couple listen to it. The girl then took the presents Quanta; The Liar gave to the kids and placed them on a chair on Quanta’s porch. The girl took off in her car when Quanta called to talk to the husband. “What is going on, why did your wife bring back the gifts?” “Well it’s been documented that you said you were going to burn my wife’s car.” “I didn’t say that, now what, am I going to get beaten up again?” Quanta, The Liar screams. (Where does she come up with this stuff?) “What do you mean documented?” Quanta, The Liar wants to know. “We just know you said it.” “I never said that.” Quanta, The Liar hangs up the phone and calls her mother. “My children are playing with the kids across the street, isn’t that sweet.” Liar, Liar pants on fire. Grandmother, contrary to what your daughter says nobody talks to her or spends his or her day rattling on about the neighbor next to the corner business center. Rita Lott 2000
Copyright © 2000 Rita A. Lott |