Doctor Trek - Crossbreed (1) DOCTOR TREK THE EARLY YEARS CROSSBREED BY IAN KIDD CHAPTER ONE Gordon Macklin walked down the corridors of the Great Northern Hotel in the small American town of Twin Peaks until he came to the office of the hotel's owner, Benjamin Horne, and strode in without knocking. Benjamin Horne was lazing in his chair, smoking a cigar, waiting for him. "Ah, Mr Macklin," he smiled warmly, "you made it," he stretched out his hand. "It would seem so," Gordon refused the proferred handshake. "Could we get to business, please, Mr Horne. It's been a long trip." "Yes of course, Mr Macklin," Benjamin sat up, ready for action. "You are here to join forces with me in developing the Ghostwood estate." "And in the process," Gordon cut in, "spread Macklin's from Australia to the US, to make it an international company." "So we're helping each other, as business colleagues should," Benjamin smiled charmingly. "You're supplying me with the finance for the Ghostwood estate project, and I'm helping you break Macklin's into the international market, not to mention allowing us both publicity with your "free holidays" for these Australian tourists from - where was it?" he flicked some papers on his desk, "Summer Bay and Erinsborough?" "Correct," Macklin didn't really trust Horne's false charm. "The Summer Bay people are already here. The Erinsboroughites arrive tomorrow. Now if you could give me the contract?" "Certainly." Ever anxious to please (too anxious as far as Macklin was concerned), Benjamin handed over the papers. "Will you be needing a pen?" "I'm not going to sign them here and now," Gordon said sharply. "I'll have my solicitor check over the papers in the morning and I'll get them back to you by, say, 7 o'clock in the evening. That alright with you?" "Of course, Gordon," Benjamin got up to show his guest out. "You know best." "Indeed I do," Gordon looked him up and down with a rising contempt. These Americans! Such arrogance! "A pleasure doing business with you, Mr Horne," he moved to leave. "And you," Benjamin shut the door after him. "Sucker." Gordon Macklin and the lucky tourists from Summer Bay weren't the only new arrivals in Twin Peaks that night, as anyone passing the Double "R" diner may have noticed, with the strange blue police box parked outside it. Inside, a short, scruffy-looking man with a dark brown jacket, checked trousers and panama hat, together with a spunky young teenage girl who had on a black jacket, with assorted badges, and the word "ACE" scrawled on the back, had just entered. "You know, Ace," the Doctor sighed, "there are only two places in the universe where one can find truly superlative cherry pies." Ace looked round the diner, with it's assorted bunch of oddball customers, and sighed. "Well, couldn't we try the other place?" "Ace," the Doctor groaned, coming up to the counter. A sexy young woman came up to him. "What can I do for you?" she inquired. "Ah, erm, hello Shelley," the Doctor doffed his hat. "Two pieces of cherry pie, please." Shelley smiled and nodded and walked away. Ace leant in on him. "You know her?" "I've been here before," the Doctor explained. Ace pulled a face. "You've been everywhere before. Doesn't it get boring?" Shelley returned with two slices of cherry pie. "Anything else?" "Two black coffees, please," the Doctor smiled. "Professor!" Ace groaned. "I hate black coffee." "You'll love theirs," the Doctor confided. "It's incredible. Now get stuck into that cherry pie and do your taste buds a favour they won't forget," he sipped on his newly-arrived scolding hot coffee. "Damn fine coffee," he smiled. Ace's attention was caught by a handsome young man sitting across from her, who was confiding to an older waitress "This must be where pies go when they die." "You should get to know him, Professor," Ace nodded over to him. "Sounds like he's a kindred spirit." "Only because you happen to have the hots for him," the Doctor teased. "I do not!" Ace punched him in the arm. The man finished his pie and walked over to the door, smiling at her as he did. Ace noted the letters on his jacket with awe. "FBI," she breathed. "Oh, God..." "Ace, you're drooling on your pie," the Doctor reproved. Ace gulped. Another universe away, the starship TARDISPRISE was busy going in circles and trying to look important. "Hi," Sammy entered the console room, looking a tad dejected. "Hello!" Captain Who beamed cheerfully. "What's the matter? I thought you said you'd found some episodes of "Neighbours"?" "Yeah, they're crap," Sammy told him. "Cody pissed off to America, dumped Todd for some yank, he fell in love with this geeky blonde, had sex with her - " Frobisher, in humanoid form once again, jumped up. "I'm just going to watch "Neighbours"." Who pulled him back down. "Got her pregnant, she decided to have an abortion, he tried to stop her and got run over by a van and killed," Sammy finished. "Blimey, and all in one episode?" Mr Wok whistled. "What a fast-paced show." "I kind of gave up after that," Sammy told them mournfully. "I still haven't found the whole previous year of Cody episodes I missed." "Well, I'm sure - " Who broke off as a beeping noise filled the room. "What's that?" Wok bustled around the console. "Message from Admiral Borusa, Captain. Apparently there are some strange worm-holes appearing in the fabric of space and time. There's one opening a couple of inches away from us right now, it seems." "What do these worm-holes do?" Who inquired. "No one knows for sure," Wok frowned, "but it's theorised that they could be gateways through to other times, other places - parallel universes, if you like." "That's interesting," Who commented. "Did you say a couple of inches?" Frobisher wanted to know. There was a loud bang, and the TARDISPRISE began rocking from side to side, like something very powerful had a grip on it. "What's happening?" Who cried. "I could have a bloody good guess!" Frobisher screamed. Morning. The two taxi's pulled up outside the Great Northern Hotel and seven teenagers climbed out, grabbed their luggage, paid the drivers and waved them goodbye. "Well, boss," the young, tough-looking American named Spike Thompson leaned on the gorgeous brunette, "you finally agree to come on a trip with me back home, and we end up in the backwater of civilisation?" His 'boss', Lynda Day, regarded him cooly. "Well, I just thought this was a typical representation of America. After all, I can imagine this place producing YOU." Chunky, reliable Kenny Phillips tapped her on the shoulder. "Er, boss, I don't mean to intrude on the terribly witty banter - " "I don't think there's anything terribly witty about it," the gorgeous (if bitchy) blonde Sam Black interrupted. "But - " Kenny continued, ignoring her, "we have company." Lynda turned to see a tourist bus pulling up across the road. "Look at all the tourists," she frowned. "I wouldn't have thought this place would attract this many visitors," she turned to Kenny. "You don't think these people could be using the murders to make money, do you?" "You mean like we're doing?" Sam interrupted again. Lynda stared at her, offended. "We're not!" she argued. "We're on holiday." "Oh no, of course not," Sam pouted. "We just happen to get a free, all-expenses paid trip from Matt Kerr as a present for running the Junior Gazette so well, and we just happen to get sent to the small American town whose high school prom queen just happened to get murdered by her own father, who turned out to be a deranged schizo, and where a crazed, insanely clever and murderous ex-FBI agent has arrived to have his revenge on his former partner. But that's all coincedence, isn't it? I mean, I'm sure none of it will somehow end up on our front page, will it?" "If someone happens to mention it while we're here, I may note something down," Lynda said defensively. "Yeah, right," Sam pouted. "Come on, Sam, let's get our stuff inside," Sam's equally blonde (but not quite as gorgeous and DEFINITELY nowhere near as bitchy) friend Sarah Jackson urged her on. "I'll just be a minute," Lynda told them, hurrying over to the tourist bus and accosting a pony-tailed young man climbing off it. "Er, excuse me, I'm Lynda Day." "Todd Landers," the young man introduced himself. "Yes, quite," Lynda dismissed it. "Would you mind telling me what you're doing here in Twin Peaks?" "We all won a competition," Todd told her. "I see, thank you," Lynda turned away and smartly and walked back to the others. "There could be a front page in this yet," she announced. "Yes, Lynda," Kenny said sternly, "but didn't you promise me you'd stop yourself doing any work this holiday and simply try and relax?" Lynda smiled charmingly. "Didn't I give you my solemn word of honour on it, Kenny?" "Yes, Lynda," Kenny agreed dolefully. "That's what I'm worried about." Todd watched them go and then turned and called back into the bus. "Hurry up, Cody." "Sorry," the pink mini-skirted, dark-haired, incredibly cute teenage girl known as Cody Willis emerged from the bus. "Let's get going." CHAPTER TWO Deep in Twin Peaks' thick and less-than-spectacularly-well-lit woods, the small furry animals were alarmed by a strange VWORP! VWORP! noise as the teleport cubicle materialised out of nowhere around a small pool. Captain Who, Mr Wok, Frobisher and Sammy Davis Jnr stepped out into the foliage. "Ah," Who took a breath of fresh air. "How bracing." "Doesn't look much like a parallel universe, does it?" Sammy noted. "I mean, where's the differences?" "Give it time, Sammy, give it time," Who instructed. "We haven't met any people yet. For all we know, they could all be flesh-eating zombies or a sex-mad all-female species." "Let's find out," Frobisher urged. "Hey, what's this, Captain?" Sammy was kneeling by the pool. "Whatever's in here definitely ain't water." "Mm," Who squatted down, dabbed his finger in the liquid and sniffed. "Scorched engine oil. Interesting." "So?" Frobisher scowled. "So some guy let out all the oil from his car and set fire to it. So what? Let's go and find these sex-mad females!" "Whoa!" Wok reeled. "Where did all those red curtains come from?" Who looked up to see strange red drapes appearing out of nowhere in the woods. "I sense the atmosphere changing," he revealed. "The fabric of this dimension is being ripped apart." "What's happening?" Frobisher cried. Who stood up bravely. "We're being pulled into another dimension." "Oh, great!" Frobisher complained. "Haven't I been through enough for one day?" Not far away from where Who and co. were undergoing their latest crisis stood a log cabin. Inside the cabin, sitting on a chair and brooding over a chess game, was a madman. This madman became alerted to the fact strange things were happening in Twin Peaks (well, stranger than usual) by a peculiar VWORP! VWORP! noise coming from outside. Grabbing his poisoned dart gun, he hurried out of the cabin. He couldn't see anything unusual - oh, except for that brand new, shiny plastic tree that hadn't been there last night! As the madman watched in amazement, someone literally stepped out of the tree and began walking toward him. It was a man, dressed all in black, with a neatly trimmed beard and moustache, and a smooth, wrinkle-free face. He was apparently ageless (except for that slight bit of middle-aged paunch). "Who are you?" he demanded in rich, velvety tones. "I am Windom," the madman found himself compelled to answer. "Wind an' piss - er, I mean Windom Earle. Who are you?" "I am the Master," the stranger told him, "and you will obey me." "Will I?" Windom pulled out his dart gun and fired. The Master caught the dart easily between two of his gloved fingers. "Fascinating," he complimented, "but if you really want to kill someone - try this," he produced the Tissue Compressor Eliminator and fired. A red haze surrounded Windom, who began to scream - and then vanished. The Master looked down at where the maniac had been - and there was a shrunken doll, where the face of the miniaturised ex-FBI agent was still contorted with agony. The Master stood on the doll, crushing it to dust beneath his shoe, and chuckled evilly. "Heh heh heh." "What's going on?" Sammy wanted to know. He, Who, Wok and Frobisher had found themselves standing in a long marble corridor, with red drapes around them. "This looks like the London Theatre." "Only one way to find out," Who rubbed his hands together eagerly and dived through the drapes, into a large room which had a sofa, a chair, a pot of coffee - "No tea!" Who exclaimed in distaste - and a red-jacketed dwarf. "He's a bit of a weirdo, isn't he?" Frobisher commented. The Little Man looked at him in distaste. ",pu kcuf eht tuhS" he said. "Er, quite," Who pondered on that. "That settles it," Frobisher decided. "We're in Bulgaria." "Shut up," Who chided him. ",dias lleW" The Little Man smiled and winked. "What?" Frobisher groaned. "?teliot eht nwod daeh sih ffuts uoy t'naC" The Little Man questioned. "Hang on a mo," Who thought fast. "I've an idea what's happening here." ",toi uoy sdrakcab gniklat m'I" The Little Man squawked. "He's talking backwards!" Who realised. "He's talking backwards!" "!hajulydoolbellaH," The Little Man cried. "Where are we?" Who wanted to know. "boB rof tou hctaW .egdoL kcalB eht ni er'uoY" The Little Man exclaimed. "Who's Bob?" Who demanded. The lighting changed to strobe effect. "!boB ma I" came a roar behind them. Who and co. turned to see a scruffy, straggly-haired, evil-looking fellow leering at them through the curtains. "He's Bob," Who guessed correctly. "He's one of those people who visit kiddies playgrounds," Frobisher whispered. He leaned over towards Bob. "Do you need a comb?" Sammy was getting more and more nervous. "Captain, I know where we are." "Ssh, Sammy," Who went over towards the demonically grinning Bob. "What do you want from us?" ".em rof llik uoy tnaw I" Bob screeched. "Captain!" Sammy roared. "We're in Twin Peaks! I used to watch this bloody show! That's the demonic hippie that took over Leland and made him kill Laura Palmer! Get us the hell out of here!" "!ton ro uoy ti eb eno dnif lliw I dna elcihev a deen I" Bob roared. "?lous ruoy of noissesop ekat ot ydob ruoy otni em tel uoy lliW" "No!" Sammy screamed, running toward him. "Piss off back to David Lynch!" he kneed the demonic spirit in the genitals. "I want out of here - now!" There was a flash and Who and co. found themselves standing back by the pool of scorched engine oil. "What was all that about?" Who demanded. "I'll tell you later," Sammy gasped. "Let's get out of here!" They raced off. Lying less than a few feet away, buried in shrub and which in their panic they had spectacularly failed to notice, was a not-exactly-minute-but-in-fact- quite-large-actually metal spacecraft, the entrance to which was now opening, to reveal something hideously unpleasent inside... CHAPTER THREE Benjamin Horne was lazing back in his chair, puffing on his cigar (does he ever do anything else?) when the double-doors of his office opened and a short, apparently permanently excited little man barged through them and dumped his many suitcases on the floor. "Ben! Ben! Ben!" the little man exclaimed. "Great news! The deal is almost done! We've almost all the money we need for the Ghostwood estate project!" "Excellent, Jerry," Benjamin smirked. "But I'm afraid you've had a wasted journey." "Hunh?" Jerry squatted down and began unzipping one of his suitcases. "I have an investor right here in the Great Northern, who's on the verge of signing on the dotted line and giving us all the finance, we need," Benjamin told his brother gleefully. "Oh," Jerry's face fell, but picked up again almost immediately. "Ah, but it hasn't entirely been a wasted trip," he picked up one of two, large, wrapped baguettes and handed one to a curious Benjamin. "Your favourite, remember? I tell you, I had four of these in one day while I was over there!" Benjamin took a large bite and spat it out in one mouthful. "Jerry!" he bawled. "It's disgusting! It's ham! Blecch!" "What are you talking about?" Jerry stared at him in amazement. "You LOVE ham." Benjamin stared at him in naked fury. "Get out!" he roared aggressively. "What?" Jerry puzzled over this odd behaviour. "Ben - are you alright?" Benjamin grabbed him and threw him from the room, slamming and locking the doors. "Get out and stay out!" In the hall, Jerry stared at the lock door in bemusement. "Er - Ben?" he called. "What?" "Can I have my luggage back?" "NO!" In the restaurant of the Great Northern, an even-odder-than-usual assortment of guests were undertaking breakfast - the Twin Peaks regulars, numerous assorted Australian tourists, the Doctor and Ace, and, crowded around the centre table, the journalists from the Junior Gazette. "Listen to me, Lynda," Colin Mathews, the paper's young financial advisor (and general all-round rip-off merchant) was saying. "However terrific an editor you are - and I'm sure we all agree you are the Junior Gazette equivalent of - " "Atilla the Hun," Spike quipped. Lynda glared. "Margaret Thatcher," Colin continued, undeterred. "Colin, you're an excellent salesman," Lynda told him, "but you're bloody awful at flattery. Stop trying to butter me up and tell me what you want." "And why do I need to want something?" Colin sat back, mock-offended. "I'm hurt, Lynda, I'm deeply, deeply hurt on a deeply personal level. As if I can't merely express my feelings of appreciation for my editor without wanting something. I'm really hurt, Lynda." "Well, in that case I apologise," Lynda replied insincerely. "With your vulgar grovelling, I merely assumed you were after personal favours, but if your appreciation was sincere, then I apologise most profusely." "Thank you, Lynda," Colin looked distinctly uncomfortable. "There is just one thing..." Lynda sighed wearily. "What is it, Colin?" Colin leant forward and continued in a confidential tone. "Lynda, we both know that this holiday is no such thing, and we both know why we're really here. I was just thinking...maybe a few exclusive photos and camera footage of Benjamin Horne - the owner of this hotel, and the business partner of killer Leland Palmer, and a man who had an illicit affair with Laura Palmer, the deceased - could do no end of good spicing up our lead story, don't you think?" "Colin," Lynda began conremptuously, "that is the most disgusting kind of gutter journalism you've ever come up with, and I'll have no part in it." "Oh," Colin sat back, defeated. "Of course," Lynda smiled, "I don't have to know, do I?" Colin grinned. "Thanks, Lynda," he scurried away, out of the restaurant, just as Captain Who, Mr Wok, Frobisher and Sammy were strolling in. Who looked around in surprise. "Charming place, isn't it?" "Quite," Wok sounded bored. "Amazing," Frobisher sounded like he was dead. "Oh my God," Sammy sounded like he WISHED he was dead. "What is it, Sammy?" Who inquired. "Over there, by the window," Sammy's voice was hoarse. "There's a bunch of Australians." "Well get the camera ready," Frobisher yawned. "It's a Kodak moment." "So?" Who asked. "See the boy with the pony-tail and the girl next to him?" Sammy continued. "Yes," Who confirmed Sammy wasn't having an hallucination. "The boy is Todd Landers," Sammy said with some despair. "The girl is Cody Willis." Who, Wok and Frobisher turned to look at him. "The Cody Willis?" Who demanded. "THE Cody?" Sammy nodded slowly. "Oh, yes." "Oh, this is gonna be fun," Frobisher grinned wickedly, raising his voice. "Hey, Miss Willis, my friend here - " "No way!" Sammy dashed away. Who groaned. "Oh, well done, Frobisher." Frobisher looked at him, oh-so-innocently. "Who? Me?" Colin was in the room exactly on top of Benjamin's office. Noting the wide gaps between the floorboards, Colin put his eye to the floor and found he could see straight into Benjamin's wash-room, and saw Benjamin standing by the sink, fiddling with his eyes like he was taking contact lenses out. With sleazy headlines already flying around in front of his eyes - "SLEAZEBALL BUSINESSMAN NEEDED HELP TO SEE HIS LOVER'S TITS", "SLEAZEBALL BUSINESSMAN DIDN'T REALISE HE WAS SCREWING HIS PARTNER'S DAUGHTER BECAUSE HE DIDN'T PUT HIS CONTACT LENSES IN", Colin put the video camera to the edge of the crack and began taping. Benjamin took something out of his left eye and dropped it into a container. Colin recoiled in shock. It looked like an eyeball! Benjamin did the same with his right eye, and dropped a second eyeball into the container. Benjamin turned around. Colin gasped in horror. Where the eyeballs had been were blazing red eyes, alive with alien fury. And those eyes saw Colin right through the floorboards. Colin uttered a silent scream. Benjamin(?) leapt into the air, grabbing onto the ceiling, and ripping away the floorboards. Colin tried to stagger away, but Benjamin grabbed him by the throat and threw him (and his video camera) onto the floor below. Benjamin leapt down and put his hands around Colin's throat, trying to throttle him. In desperation, Colin clawed at his attacker's face until he saw in horror that his fingers were actually sinking into Benjamin's skin, to reveal a dark, mottled green beneath. Benjamin turned his head away, slightly relaxing his grip on Colin, but Colin clawed violently at Benjamin's skin, which tore away, revealing to Colin a creature from his worst nightmares. Colin screamed at the green-skinned alien and thrust him away. Immediately, the creature started back at him, hissing venomously. Colin cast around desperately for a suitable weapon. His eyes lighted on the video camera, and he grabbed it and swung round desperately to clobber the head of the alien thingy advancing upon him. 'Benjamin' reeled and Colin hit him with the camera again, knocking him to the floor. Desperately, Colin raced toward the double-doors, and began fumbling with the key in the lock. 'Benjamin' climbed to his feet and began lurching toward Colin. Colin turned the key, opened the door and ran frantically out of the office and down the corridor just before Benjamin reached it, inadvertently scaring the willies out of the Log Lady, who was just coming the other way. 'Benjamin' cursed in some unintelligible alien tongue, slammed and locked the door, unconcerned about the Log Lady (whom no one would listen to anyway, let alone believe) and began thinking furiously about his next course of action. Captain Who found Sammy in the rest-room, standing by a sink, staring at himself in the mirror. "My running off was a bit gay, really, wasn't it?" "Well," Who shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. "I wasn't going to say anything. But - why did you run off, exactly?" "Why?" Sammy turned to face him. "Because ferret-faced Frobisher was about to tell the girl I love that I love her! I mean, how embarrassing." "Er - I see," Who tried to fathom out the logic of that sentence. "Would that be so bad?" "Of course it would!" Sammy cried. "What if she couldn't stand the sight of me?" Who frowned. "And what if she fell madly and hopelessly in love with you? You never know until you try." "But - but - " Sammy tried to search for an excuse. "I think the reason you're so afraid to face this is why you fell in love with her in the first place," Who told him. "Hunh?" now Sammy was confused. "Oh, I'm sure the fact you thought she was cute, pretty, likeable and funny was a part of it," Who continued, "but I think the main reason was she was a fictional character." Sammy frowned. "I don't get it." "I think you do," Who replied. "You're an orphan, and you've always been alone. Shifted around from place to place, people to people. No one sticks around for long, isn't that true?" "Yes," Sammy admitted reluctantly. "So you're afraid to get attached to someone, for fear of them leaving," Who said simply. "You fell in love with Cody because she was a fictional character. You could tape all her episodes on video, play them, and you'd never lose her. Right?" Sammy sighed. "Right." "That's not life, Sammy," Who informed him. "That's hell. Now you're here, Cody's real, she's alive, and you're afraid." "Damn right I'm afraid," Sammy said slowly. "Too damn right." "But Sammy," Who continued, "you can't go through life without getting close to someone, and you certainly can't go through life without taking a few risks. Take a risk, Sammy - you may find happy endings aren't just on tv, after all." Sammy turned to face him, wiping away a few unshed tears. "Thanks, Captain," he said earnestly. Who grinned affably. "That's alright, Sammy," he put his arm around his friend. "Just doing my job - you know, Starship Captain, Agony Aunt, etcetera, etcetera." Sammy looked up at him and grinned cheerfully. "Have you thought about writing for "The News of the World"?" Who laughed. The staff of the Junior Gazette were just finishing off breakfast when a decidedly dishevelled looking Colin came scrambling in. "Lynda!" he gasped desperately. "Benjamin Horne!" "What about him?" Lynda asked sharply. "He's not just a normal, albeit unusually sexually-tilted businessman who's partner raped and murdered his own daughter," Colin informed her breathlessly. "He's not?" Lynda frowned. "No," Colin gasped, "he's an alien." CHAPTER FOUR A few minutes later, with the "Junior Gazette" staff having departed to find psychiatric counselling for Colin, Who and Sammy strolled back in, rejoining Wok and Frobisher. "Found the cry-baby, did you?" Frobisher commented rudely. "Frobisher - " Who began. "It's alright, Captain," Sammy smiled, "I can deal with him." He began to walk over to where Cody and Todd were sitting. "Oh, good, we gonna have a restaurant-room brawl, are we?" Frobisher smirked. "Ah," Who chewed on his lip, "I'd rather forgotten about Todd."
Copyright © 1992 Ian Kidd |