AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (7) Don't Let Your Horseshoe Hit The Plum Tree (Short Stories) A funny little tale about a country teenager [854 words] [Humor] Faded Paperdolls (Poetry) Looking back to days gone by. [176 words] [Relationships] Little Dog Walking (Poetry) Tender poem about stray dogs. [101 words] [Animal] Mama's Pocketbook (Poetry) A lady thinks back to life with her Mother. Sweet and touching poem. [306 words] [Relationships] No Crib For His Bed (Short Stories) A very touching and heartwarming story of God's love and miracles.. [847 words] [Spiritual] Prince And The Porch Swing (Short Stories) A heartwarming tale of a little girl and her dog.. [1,064 words] [Animal] The Tornado Man (Short Stories) A heartwarming tale about a child's faith in God. [1,060 words] [Spiritual]
That Really Burn’S My Biscuits- On Both Sides!!! Seleta V Johnson
Brand new cars driving on the same roads that I do, each and every day, turning off the road right in front of me and apparently with no turn signals!! How many times have I slammed on my brakes, while involuntarily throwing the palm of my hand across the body of my little red Pomeranian- protecting her from hitting the dashboard? Yeah, I get the middle finger from the driver that didn’t use the signals, but why? I am not driving your car! I have enough to do just making sure that I don’ t turn my old Ford Pinto into a batting ram!!! And, might I just add this to you, my insurance company will not buy you another Jaguar. You might just wind up driving a Ford Pinto just like the one I drive! And it might even be the same putrid color of green!!
Ok. Now I have driven my share of clunkers in my 48 years of living. I started out at the ripe old age of 8, driving my dad's 46 Ford pickup with the gas and brake pedals weighted down with concrete blocks, because I was much too short to reach them. A tiny blonde tousle haired tomboy, yes, I was a lot smaller than the other kids my own age. Wearing my size 6x overalls, and my little red checked flannel shirt, I was taught the art of getting by and living life the only way we knew how, back in the country hills of Tennessee.
My dad would wake me up at 4 a.m. on Saturday mornings just to drive the truck for him. His brother and a couple of cousins from down the road would arrive, and we would all pile into the cab of that old pickup for a hard day's work. Yes, in those days, a child of 8 had more important things to do than to sleep late or watch cartoons, on a warm Saturday morning. I had to help my family earn a living, and I did my part, driving the old truck while my dad and the guys loaded hay on the back. This hay would be sold to the local farmers as food for their livestock. I think at that time, we each made about a dollar on every load of hay, and it only took us just about 2 hours to make it. That was mighty good money in those days.
Mama would sometimes let me go to the picture show later that same day, if we got the hay put in the barn before the rain started. For some strange reason, in those days, seemed to me like it rained a whole lot more than it does today. Maybe it was just my thinking, but, I have asked a lot of folks about it, and every one of them remembers it the same way that I do.
I can still recall sitting in the old Marshall Theatre on a lazy Saturday afternoon, rain hitting the big windows and dripping down like icicles hanging on a cold wintry morning. I would sit in the last row in one of those big overstuffed seats that was supposed to be for 2 people, just hanging on to my old brown and white choo-choo bag, munching on a bag of special popcorn that could only be found at picture shows, and sipping a sweet extra syrupy Dr. Pepper. Ahhh, now that was the life. A girl of 8 could just lean back there, and drift off to never, never land. Or, follow a winding yellow brick road that led through the darkest woods. Over hills and valleys, through fields of mystical flowers until all at once, the woods seemed to open their doors and , the most beautiful emerald green palace could be seen resting on the very top of that hill. How I wished I could go with Dorothy and her friends just one time to meet the wizard. I could just imagine pushing the button and the doorbell would sound… This is when I realize that, the driver of the Jaguar is brazenly honking his horn at me, and I can see that middle finger waving for all the other drivers to see also. Oh how bad I want just one time to open my door, walk over to the other driver, and very politely ask them one question…Do you realize how much money you have spent on this brand new car, and it doesn’t even have turn signals???
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