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TITLE (EDIT)
I Bid You Adieu And Fuck You! |
DESCRIPTION
Some more copy cat horror dedicated to you RICHARD. I sincerely hope you enjoy it.
[527 words] |
AUTHOR
Emory L Griffin |
ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
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[January 2009] |
AUTHOR'S E-MAIL ADDRESS
amilla91@yahoo.com |
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (16)
1 To 3 Turns (Short Stories) inspired by Bruce Coville's the monster's ring. It is a little more dark, and slightly more ominous. [1,254 words]
A Kid Named Eddie (Short Stories) Tale of a twisted boy. [716 words]
Ain't Love Grand? (Short Stories) short horror story,in my opinion, my best. [876 words]
Bon Appetit (Short Stories) A chilling meal for three. [821 words]
Death's Embrace (Short Stories) An old woman is paid a visit from death. [597 words]
Giving, An American Tradition (Short Stories) - [749 words]
Life After Death? (Short Stories) thought provoking short. [681 words]
Lose Or Win, It's All The Same In The End. (Short Stories) post-apocalyptic America story. It's short, so do me a favor and read it. Let me know if you like it. [269 words]
Mail (Short Stories) a man receives a horrifying letter. [382 words]
Moving In (Short Stories) An homage to "The new house" by Randall Barfield. I hope I did it justice. [598 words]
My Lady In White (Short Stories) different direction than my other stories. [768 words]
Paranoia(Have I Told You This?) (Short Stories) Insight into a man slowly losing his mind due to paranoia. [396 words]
Return Mail(Mail Part 2) (Short Stories) - [318 words]
She Only Got Flowers From Him Once. (Short Stories) Pretty serious read and I believe it's some good stuff. It's a different direction than my other stuff. [539 words]
The Doctor Is In. (Short Stories) short horror story [538 words]
The Elephant In The Room (Short Stories) short horror story [852 words]
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I Bid You Adieu And Fuck You!
Emory L Griffin
He sits, as he does everyday, alone eating a cold dinner at his dining room table. He has performed this same little song and dance for the past fifty years. He knows what it is to be lonely, to sit in a cold, dark house with no warm loving family sorrounding him.
Tonight he is in a reflective mood wondering if he went back and changed the way he was, if any of it would turn out differently. He sits and he thinks about all the people he has pushed away, all the loving friends and family that have turned their backs on his bitter and selfish ways. He sits lonely and feeling sorry for himself knowing that all he has left to console him his is large collection of great authors that the kids nowadays won't read or try to emulate. As this thought crosses his mind, he thinks of all the kid's writing he reads on his newfangled computer and he is filled with a righteous anger.
He suddenly knows a way to make himself feel better about his wasted life, he shuffles over to the computer and cuts it on. He slowly lowers himself into his seat, hearing his loud, ancient knees cracking loudly as he does so. He knows that if he can find a story written by one of these snot nosed young kids, he can plaster it with negative and unwarranted criticism, so that he can feel a little better about his empty life. He pushes his spectacles farther up on his nose, his old gummy eyes are not what they used to be when he was bullying others in his prime, he allows himself a little smile as he uses his vast collection of big words, which does not make him better than anyone as he mistakenly thinks it does. He writes the comment aiming for an air of superiority and condensation, I wonder if the old man knows that everyone sees through this little ploy. He crushes no one's dreams, in fact he only fuels the flame that burn in some young writers to write more and better stories.
The same stories that he considers crap. He is sitting at his computer feeling the same euphoric glow he always does after he has spewed forth his venom of "constructive" criticism, when suddenly there is a loud noise. He starts violently and then regains himself, he is readying himself to yell at the stranger who dares to trespass on his solitude, when suddenly a large hooded figure swoops into the room. He can barely make out the words the figures is saying to him, something about a special hug, his ancient hearing is not what it used to be. The hooded figure is suddenly upon him and embraces him tightly, all he feels is burning as it gets unbearablly hot. He can barely breathe around the smell of brimstone and fire. All that is left is a burnt, charred corpse, not sorrounded by family or friends, but sorrounded by a monumental collection of great writer's works that the kids of today could never be, not with their slash and cut, copy cat horror.
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READER'S REVIEWS (6)
DISCLAIMER: STORYMANIA DOES NOT PROVIDE AND IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR REVIEWS. ALL REVIEWS ARE PROVIDED BY NON-ASSOCIATED VISITORS, REGARDLESS OF THE WAY THEY CALL THEMSELVES.
"WOW! That was kinda mean don’t you think? Alas, I admit I do understand about the ugly comments…I’ve had a few. I think constructive is the key word in reviewing. I do think this was well written, visuals were well applied. But to quote one line of this story…”He crushes no one's dreams, in fact he only fuels the flame that burn in some young writers to write more and better stories.”…perhaps that is the goal after all.But I, like Richard and others have been here a long time, and there have been many greats…I have a few suggested readings if you’d care to give them a read…two last words…keep writing!!" -- Mattie.
"I admit it was slightly exaggerated, but to be completely honest I have rather enjoyed my verbal sparring matches with Richard. I do believe he is a crabby old ass, but I think he enjoys the rage he ignites. I would love to hear your suggestions. " -- Emory Griffin, Georgia , U.S.A.
"One of my favorite writers who still has her postings here was Judith Goff. Sadly she passed away several years ago...but her muses were awesome...in my opinion anyway. R Bennett Okerstrom has some great postings as well, Just A Guy had some pretty funny stuff too...the list is long. Of course these are mostly poetry that‘s more my thing I guess...give a look and tell me what you think." -- Mattie.
"OK, You know I couldn't resist responding to yet another feeble attempt at writing by you. First of all, your perception of me is not even close. I don't sit alone in my house (which I own) eating cold dinners and I never post my reviews from my home computer but instead, use my office computer. Most of my friends don't even know I waste some of my valuable time reading pathetic attempts at writing like yours. Also, I never dwell upon my past behavior and have little time to feel sorry for myself.(And no reason to) What regrets I do have certainly don't include any of the reviews I've written about your work or anyone else's for that matter. As to this piece you've written, My comments which seem negative to you and others are, on the contrary, honest and accurate and hardly unwarranted. If you think my vocabulary consists of a "vast collection of big words," then you haven't read enough. Others encourage you to keep writing. I encourage you to read more and write less for now. You and other writers I've cricized, may think I'm mostly negative but it bugs me to read anything that is flawed with misspelling, poor grammar and punctuation, not to mention poor diction (choice of words). These mistakes distract the reader and disrupt his mood, causing him to lose interest in what could possibly be a good story line. For example, you write in your third paragraph,..."aiming for an air of superiority and CONDENSATION"... Condensation as in water vapor? I'm sure you were thinking of condescending or condescention but it's up to you to review and edit your own work yourself before posting or submitting it. Second paragraph, last sentence, ..."he thinks of all the kid's writings" You said all the kids, which is plural so you needed KIDS' not kids. You may say this is minor and kind of nitpicky, but to me it stands out like a sore thumb. Then you throw in "newfangled" to describe his computer, a word often attributed to a country bumpkin. Like this guy doesn't know what "state of the arts" means. How corny and stupid is that? Again in the second last paragraph you say,"everyone sees through this little ploy". Ploy to do what? Crush these writers' dreams? Dead wrong Emory! I really am trying to help these writers by telling them to stop skipping over writing 101 and jumping into writing 400 when they aren't ready. Finally, "Spewing his venom of constructive criticism." To you Emory, truth and honesty must also seem venomous. Then you close it off by having a "large hooded figure" enter this room. Now that's really original! Since you describe him (me) as being so old and decrepid, you could've just had him suffer a heart attack, while his life of cruelty and insensitivity flashed before him. Overall, not one of your better efforts. "Sorry Charlie, only the finest Tuna get to be Starkist." " -- THE REAL RICHARD.
" I'm relatively new to this site but I've had a chance to read quite a few of the stories and poetry presented here. I'm currently employed as a technical editor for a science magazine but I've always been interested in fiction writing and am currently working on a novel which I someday hope to get published. I browsed through the Advisor section and noticed the comments made by Emory Griffin, responding to Richard's apparent farewell address. His farewell was obviously a bit premature as I later stumbled across this story by Mr. Griffin dedicated to Richard and of course, there was Richard's review. I don't blame Richard for his criticism of this story and his points are well taken. He didn't even mention Griffin's classless title to the story. Stooping to this kind of vulgarity is not clever and only calls attention to the writer's immaturity. I agree that reviewers should not have to "edit" these stories. Reviewers should be able to focus on the plot or story line as well as pace and character development, framed within a good beginning and ending, instead of cleaning up technical mistakes as I do for a living. There are two basic reasons for technical errors such as incorrect spelling, poor grammar and punctuation, etc. The worst of the two is the unawareness or ignorance of the writer because this is usually an educational deficiency which could take a long time to correct. The other reason is carelessness or negligence; usually the result of not taking enough time to edit one's work. We are all human and despite tools like "Spellcheck" and other aids, the English language is so full of idioms and synonyms, it is impossible to rely on mechanical software to guarantee infallibility. For example, despite Richard's well written review, even this master critic who emphasizes spelling and grammar, has misspelled the word "decrepit." I think Richard was probably aware of this immediately after posting the review. There is no short cut to good writing. Even among the most unorthodox artists, writers, and musicians, there is an established, rudimentary body of knowledge. The great ones never lose this knowledge. Others never had it to lose. Despite the imperfections among most amateur writers, I do enjoy reading on this site and maybe I'll try posting something someday as well. " -- Merideth.
"Emory, Take heed! There's some good stuff in those last two reviews. I don't see any response from you so I guess they must have hit home. " -- A Member of the grammar police.
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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2010 Emory L Griffin |
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
September 2010 |
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
1931
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