BLOOD OF ME
The bleeding hearts
Shattering, breaking, dieing in my hands
Don’t-don’t touch me
Never see me cry
Kill me now
Take my life out of my hands and lay down to sleep forever
Dreams beyond dreams will never be seen
I can’t face this retched horror that is unknown
You-you take away everything
And you don’t even ask how I feel
I am already damned to hell
Can you not see
My life without me 
Would not be a life at all
No sense
Leave me 
don’t come back and back
As if nothing has happened
Can you not see
My bleeding heart
I give to you 
Take it 
Leave me
Catch me 
I’m all yours…

BREAKDOWN
My worries
seem impossible to forget
My life
seems normal
though its not that descent
Faces I dont know
stare me away
I try to forget
the loneliness I feel
Seeing all around
with faces I could kill
my murderous visions haunt me
with all my heart Im dead
I wish I could cry
and fall all apart
become a whisper in the wind
and be carried everywhere
away from here 

DIEING IN THE RAIN
Do you remember when it rained?
Clouds filling my skies
and driving fear into my life
I see your face each night 
Stop-Leave me alone
The full moon rises beyond its peaks 
and it reminds me of your name 
When it rains 
It slips through my hair
Can you feel me, hear me now
Song birds die 
they lie in my arms
bleeding, suffering like me 
I hate to see everyone walking away
and it makes me wonder-why?
Are they afraid? Can they not see?
THe rain ours harder
and I sit just watching
but I cry alone
just there-by myself all alone
I always remember when it rains
Do you see me at night
when the tears stream down my face?
I dont cry for you anymore 
but I cry for myself
You dont seem to care
I have to stay where you left me
huddled in a corner dieing alone again
The rain ours down me
washing away my beauty
but you dont seem to care-that must be why you left me
I'll never be what anyone wants
but at least I'm honest about that 
Now I will die alone in the rain 
watching my dreams fade away 
I dont see how anyone can say
I'll miss her always and a day

I AM AS A BUTTERFLY
I am as a butterfly
Freedom is my name 
My life-a single second
No glory and no fame
I wrestle for my life each day
Everything harder than it seems
Everyone looking up upon me
As if I am something strange
Exotic and so beautiful
Just call me like I am
You try to catch me in a net 
And hold me in your hand
I fly away so young, so free
Because of who I am
So young, so free
I am as a butterfly
And freedom was my name

ICANT, I WONT
I want to cry all the time 
but I cant
I want to slip into darkness
but I cant 
I want to go far away
but I cant 
I want to be different
but I cant
I want you to love me 
but you wont 
I want to sleep my life away
but I wont
I want to tell you my secrets
but I wont
I dont want to stay in a closet and act scared
but I wont come out
I want you to be mine
but you ignore my real feelings
I want to end it all
but I cant...
I wont...
I couldnt dare miss whats coming next... 

I SAY NO
I say no
Though you continue to haunt
I say no
But you only try harder
I say no 
You thrust yourself into my dreams
I say no
Not meaning it 
And you listen to these pleas
You leave me and I say no
But you keep walking away
I say no as I cry and cry all day
Asking who I should hate
I think of you 
And I say no

IT WILL NOT COME
It drips by the water 
killing all it fills
mashing of teeth, driving of nails
that is how it kills
I wish for it to take me now
and carry me away
sharpened claws, snarling
but It doesnt came for me
It drips by the water and turns it red
covering up the black
I dream, I want, I wish to fly
away from this day light
I wish for it to kill me now 
but I know it will never come 
I dream of it, I want it 
but the end will never come
this day will keep the light in my eyes
and I will never get to die 
 
MORE FLOWERS FOR YOU
Waiting for you
Only to know your gone
Wishing you were with me
Only to say that you were wrong
Killing time while picking flowers 
To set them near your head
Killing time saying I love you
If only you weren’t dead
Catching butterflies and dreaming 
Of all those things you see
Wishing you were with me 
Even though you hated me… 

MY DROP OF BLOOD
The drop of blood 
Which stained my clothes
Stays clear and red
Never forgotten
The drop of blood
Which dripped down my face
Not gone but unseen
And never forgotten
The blood of my friend 
Which I wear all year long
Always with me 
Never forgotten 
My blood spilling over 
Giving wisdom
Telling stories
And hopefully never forgotten…