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TITLE (EDIT)
Raindrops And Memories |
DESCRIPTION
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[804 words] |
AUTHOR
Briony Carvalho |
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ABOUT
THE AUTHOR
just me
[January 2008] |
AUTHOR'S OTHER TITLES (36)
Autumnal Longings (Poetry) Just got a whiff of blackberries and I remembered my place in the woods where I went to think. [104 words]
Bananas (Short Stories) A very short short story [180 words] [Animal]
Brit Boys (Poetry) As promised Curious! [240 words]
Butterfly Love (Poetry) - [90 words]
Changing (Poetry) Can't ever decide anything - just jotted down the meanderings of my mind! [120 words]
Chorus Of Love (Poetry) My first attempt at a proper old school rhyming poem - one about losing 'the one' [116 words]
Destiny (Poetry) Waffly brain fart about how going back is easier than picking yourself up and moving on [153 words]
Dreams Of Reality (Novels) Thought I'd give it a try... opening chapter of a plot I've been thinking about for a long time. [659 words]
Eternal (Poetry) - [80 words]
Four Little Words (Poetry) Out the words tumble - this one is about relationships. [114 words]
He Laughs At Me (Poetry) OK being told off for not posting so here's a rubbish poem for you. [86 words]
Healing The Pain (Poetry) That feeling of uselessness you get when someone gets bad news. [105 words]
Heartbreaker (Poetry) Another attempt at rhyming - bit of a jokey one (makes a change from my terminally depressive ones!) [97 words]
How It Feels (Poetry) - [141 words]
I Cling To Hope (Poetry) Thank you MK, a little changed but still the sentiment is yours. [77 words]
I Haven't Got A Clue! (Poetry) Who does know the answers? [139 words]
Italy (Short Stories) this is a piece I've written for my Mum - PLEASE can you provide some feedback? [805 words]
Mouse Brain (Poetry) Weird little thing written whilst bored! [238 words]
Nidiot (Poetry) - [142 words]
Purge - Goodbye (Non-Fiction) - [487 words] [Mind]
Reaching For The Moon (Poetry) Just a little thing I wrote in about ten seconds when a friend bowed down to everything her bloke wanted. [96 words]
Scourge Of The Future (Poetry) Inspired by Colin Baker - you can make a poem from anything, even an old lady rant at litter louts! [75 words]
Shall I Tell You What I Really Think? (Poetry) Grr angry poem. [94 words]
Sticky Taped Heart (Short Stories) - [844 words]
Swan Dive (Novels) A little attempt at the opening chapter of a comedy (loosely) based around me [418 words]
Swan Dive - Chapter 2 (Novels) Part two of my pants comedy novel. [1,553 words]
Swan Dive - Chapter 3 (Novels) Part 3 of my stupid novel - I will put it into the first person - when I can be bothered! [732 words]
Tears And Beauty (Poetry) Sad that people are so concerned with looks. [126 words]
The Final Battle (Short Stories) Read it and you'll see! Any comments on anything I do are hugely appreciated - even if it's just to tell me to give up! [348 words]
The Mythical Creature (Poetry) Bit cheeky! [94 words]
Tiny Dreams (Poetry) As with the rest.. five minutes of brain splurge! - please please review some of my stuff - even if you think it's utter bobbins! - just amended it to have less 'she's' in it, thanks KM for the advise... [150 words]
Verbosity (Poetry) Got bored and fancied writing a silly poem for a giggle! [53 words]
Waiting In Limbo (Poetry) For my mum. [89 words]
Where You Live (Poetry) Blah blah fed up of work! [151 words]
Who Knows What Tomorrow Will Bring (Poetry) - [68 words]
You're My Shoe! (Poetry) How I feel. [83 words]
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Raindrops And Memories
Briony Carvalho
She stood and watched the fat raindrops bounce off the porch. Her breath misted up the window on the inside while the drops chased each other outside. She hated being cooped up in the house and longed to be running through the fields behind her house, the whip and sting of the thick late summer grass against her bare legs. She pulled her cardigan closer rounder her and sighed, there was no sign of the rain letting up. She crossed back over the room, fingers dancing over objects as she went; a book, a clock, the mantelpiece, she wondered what to do with her day. She’d felt lost and almost like she was floating for days, not quite sure where to go or what to do. A nagging feeling wouldn’t go away that she was supposed to be doing something, somewhere. She shook her head and wandered out to the back porch instead. Her cat was huddled in the corner and she arched her back, hissed and ran away when she walked onto the porch. Crazy cat, she thought, damn thing was always acting mad at her. She sat on the chair and looked at the clouds as they marched across the sky.
She woke up with a start, the rain was lighter but still there, where was Ben? He should be home by now. She glanced at her watch, 10:00 it read, she was quite convinced she had gone to sleep at 10:00 so she listened to it up close, shook it and then took it off. She wandered to the front of the house and looked out for Bens car. Her mind drifted back to her dream. She’d been at a party, gone outside to try and find a shop that sold more beer, she’d walked down the middle of the road trying to stick to the line, seeing the shop she’d pointed it out to her friend and as she turned to face her friend she woke up. She couldn’t work out why it disturbed her so much, it was an odd dream, one of those dreams where you wake up unsure if it was real or not. The party had been at her friends house, that she was sure of, Ben had been there but she knew that rather than dreamt it. She still had a nagging feeling in her head as she headed back into the house and into the kitchen. She wasn’t thirsty and wasn’t hungry, opening the fridge she could see casseroles and pies stacked up, the bottom ones covered in a crust of green mould. She shuddered and slammed the door to the fridge, vowing to look at it later when she felt like she could cope with it. She wandered back to the porch and sat down again listening to the rain and the occasional siren of a passing ambulance.
Still the rain. It seemed to echo in her head, the heavy splat against the window. She separated out the sounds; trickling in the gutter, splats against the screen of the door, pitter patter on the roof then she hear the swoosh of tires and the lights arced round reflecting off the drops as a car pulled into the drive. The rain seemed to double at the sight of the car and the drops were forced out of the sky, bouncing up as they hit the already drenched floor.
Standing up she peered down to the garage as the lights flicked off and the doors slammed. She didn’t recognise the car but she recognised the huddled figure of Ben as he went round to the back door to drag a very reluctant dog from the boot. The half light of the stormy sky made his face look harsh and his black hair whipped about his head. Smiling slightly she wondered where the dog came from and thought that it was so typical of him. Another set of footsteps from the passenger side caught her attention as a darkened figure stepped into the lighter area of the garage. A girl. Blonde, small pretty, her face upturned to Ben as he reached with his spare hand for hers and started to run towards the house. She stood up, heart thumping and holding her breath. The couple ran up the porch steps and through her. As they passed she felt their thought and memories. His sadness and grief, the girls feeling of living up to someone from the past and suddenly she was back in her dream, the squeal of tires as she turned round, flying through the air and being thrown high into the air, Bens face in the distance, screaming.
The couple shuddered as they ran through the cold rain and into the house. Laughing they rubbed each other with towels as she looked through the window and wept.
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READER'S REVIEWS (4)
DISCLAIMER: STORYMANIA DOES NOT PROVIDE AND IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR REVIEWS. ALL REVIEWS ARE PROVIDED BY NON-ASSOCIATED VISITORS, REGARDLESS OF THE WAY THEY CALL THEMSELVES.
"The imagery was excellent! Kinda saw the end coming...but a great write Briony!" -- mattie.
"Yeah it was a bit obvious, was planning on this being the opening chapter of a book but got bored with writing it. It was going to be obvious but then she turned evil! Thanks for the great comment though x" -- Briony.
"really enjoyed the story. had an idea of the ending but didn't spoil it, great imajery " -- Kate Kerrison.
"I like the theme, but because there've been many others like it, you might put in a few more "red Herrings, clean it up a bit amd rearrange the vision you're trying to convey to the reader. There are also some better word choices you could substitute. Aside from that, I think you write pretty well and I liked it. " -- RICHARD.
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COPYRIGHT NOTICE
© 2006 Briony Carvalho |
STORYMANIA PUBLICATION DATE
June 2006 |
NUMBER OF TIMES TITLE VIEWED
2244
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