Scary Tales (3) Causing a big scene many police officers around the office stop working and look at them arguing as a senior detective approaches the men. SENIOR DETECTIVE (to the junior detectives speaking to Steve) TELL HIM! DETECTIVE 1 But sir. SENIOR DETECTIVE (forcefully) Just tell him!! DETECTIVE 1 (to Steve) Mister Delucia, I'm sorry to tell you this but the investigation ended unofficially six months ago. We did start interviewing people and checking leads when one day NSA agents showed up here and confiscated all our computer files and documents on your wife. They had a Government warrant and refused to answer any of our questions. We were ordered, almost threatened never to discuss this matter with anyone ever including her family. With shocked eyes Steve looks at the detectives as they tell him the news. EXT.SUBURBAN HOUSE-SUNSET A station wagon pulls into the driveway. Steve and his two children, a young boy and girl exit the car and enter the house. INT.SUBURBAN HOUSE BEDROOM-LATER THAT SAME EVENING In a room nearby the two children are sleeping while John lies in bed holding a framed picture of his blonde wife (A.K.A.The Dark Devil). He is crying as he looks at the picture. Accidentally, he manages to break the frame and the picture slips out. Hidden in the frame he discovers a slip out paper that has government seal on it and is labeled TOP SECRET. Frantically, he reads the paper and in its text reveals the location of the secret government hideout in the desert. In a hurry he begins packing a suitcase. INT.GENERALS OFFICE-TOP SECRET BUILDING-NEXT MORNING The general sits at his desk as an officer enters with a report in his hand. OFFICER Sir the De-meter has been destroyed and the girl is gone. GENERAL Send two of your best assassins. I want her ELIMINATED IMMEDIATELY. EXT.HIDDEN HOUSE IN DESERT-SUNSET Outside of simple square shaped quarters a large Green Devil Robot suit with highly advanced steel wings lands. It enters the house. INT.INSIDE HIDDEN HOUSE As the Green Devil enters the main room the lights automatically turn on. It walks down the hallway. INT.HIDDEN HOUSE BEDROOM The Green Devil stands at the door of the bedroom. Inside the bed lay the nude blonde (Dark Devil) who has just awoke. A tension of darkness and shadows ensues to lead audience in believing she is about to be assassinated. DARK DEVIL (sleepy) Hey you. The Green Devils suit opens up and a gorgeous nude brunette steps out. BRUNETTE (smiling) Hey sweetie. DARK DEVIL Thank you so much for letting me stay here you are really saving my life. BRUNETTE Don't worry, you'll be safe with me, no one at the institution knows where I am. The nude blonde stands up from the bed and approaches her. The two women look into each other's eyes and begin to kiss. One thing leads another and they are soon on the bed making love under the covers. The camera fades away from the bed and towards the window as nightfall sets in. EXT.HIDDEN HOUSE-SUNRISE-NEXT DAY The Dark Devil wakes up and is felling for her lover next to her on the bed but she is not there. Suddenly, she hears gunfire in the distance. She runs into the living room to find her lover dead, her nude body in pieces scattered throughout the room, blood splattered all over the walls. She looks in terror as two Shiny Black Devil assassin robots, which are fully armed, approach her. They fire as she frantically ducks and runs into the bedroom. Quickly, she enters into her lovers green devil suit, its wings expand and she flies it out the window as the two assassins fire at her. EXT.SKIES OVER THE DESERT In the air high above the desert ground the two assassin robots chase the Green Devil like supersonic jets. They fire missiles repeatedly as the Green suit maneuvers to avoid being hit. The chase goes on for a while. INT.A DARK CAVE Soon she spots a mountain cave and enters it. The assassins follow her. It is a long spacey cavern with many tunnels. The chase continues inside the cave. The Green Devil presses some buttons on her wrist control, which causes the release of several rocket mines to drop behind her. Some of the mines explode causing damage to the assassins and slowing them down. Deeper in the cave now the assassins watch as they see the green robot suit enter into a hole in the cave, they follow her inside and then suddenly the hole explodes with fire, they are completely destroyed and in the near distance the nude blonde is in the air with a parachute unharmed she managed to escape the suit and program it to fly into the hole and self destruct. She lands fast and abruptly to the surface with an angry look on her face. EXT.TOP SECRET BUILDING-LATER THAT DAY The nude blonde (Dark Devil) sneaks around the building trying to hide from the guards. She manages to sneak her way into a side door by punching in a code on a secret control panel. INT.SMALL DARK CONTROL ROOM She quietly enters a small dark room filled with many network wire panels on the walls and sophisticated computer servers throughout. She hacks into a small computer terminal and immediately starts to enter hundreds of text commands into the keyboard very fast. She excels at mastering the highly technical menus on the LCD screen. Her efforts pay off as her work causes a dark garage like door to open on the other side of the building. INT.LAB ROOM-OTHER SIDE OF BUILDING The doors open to the lab as several dozen Dark Devil Robots storm out in a military walk some of them in pieces as they were not completely assembled yet. The massive army of Devils are under the command of the nude blonde. INT.SMALL DARK CONTROL ROOM The nude blonde sits at the terminal using the keyboard entering commands that control the army of robots. INT.HALLWAYS OF BUILDING Commotion is everywhere as the alarm is going off and soldiers are running down the halls with machine guns. The institution is on high alert as everyone frantically panics. GENERAL (shouting to a lieutenant) What the hell is going on?!! LUITENENT Were under some kind of attack sir! The general hits a concealed button in the black hallway wall, which starts up a hidden monitor screen. On it he sees the robots attacking the facility, explosions everywhere. GENERAL Holy shit! Call in all agents and assassins to the base! LUITENENT All communications are down sir! GENERAL Get me some programmers and network techs down here to disable these FUCKERS!! INT.GENERALS OFFICE The General heads back into his office alone reaches into a closet and pulls out several advanced laser guns and straps around his arms. He begins to exit the room and stops when he sees the nude blonde standing at the door. They both pause for a brief moment as their eyes are locked on each other. They both hurry to make the first move to attack. The General goes for his gun and the nude blonde pulls out a round disc and precisely throws it towards him slicing his throat open. The General falls back in anguish and dies on his desk as blood leaks down to the floor. EXT.TOP SECRET BUILDING The nude blonde walks out of the building leisurely with the general's machine gun strapped around her shoulder as explosions go off like crazy behind her. She does not flinch or pay it any mind. She walks toward a nearby dirt road leaving behind mayhem and destruction. A beat up station wagon exhausted from the long sandy trip pulls up the road and stops. Her husband John gets out of the car and calls to her. JOHN (happy and excited) Honey, we found you. She turns around and makes eye contact with him. She raises her hand and rips open her face revealing a robotic face underneath with many circuits. She raises her gun and shoots him dead. Next, she takes aim and fires at the station wagon where inside her two kids look out the window in fear. The station wagon explodes killing them. She puts her human face back into place, drops the gun, lights up a cigarette and walks into the sun on the horizon. The camera zooms into the sun as she departs the scene. FADE OUT TITLE CARD: "THE HEADLESS COW MEETS THE DEAD REINDEER" FADE IN EXT.FARM HOUSE AND CROPLAND-MORNING A raggedy broken down farmhouse rest next to neglected crop. Farmer John is riding a tractor through the field. He is a dirty man in his early thirties, long dirty blonde hair, pimples, a five 0'clock shadow beard and wearing a ripped flannel shirt and brown hat. EXT.FARM HOUSE-SUNSET Farmer John is done working for the day and is entering the house exhausted. INT.FARM HOUSE KITCHEN Farmer John enters kitchen lights up a joint and grabs a bottle of whiskey from the fridgerator. INT.FARM HOUSE LIVING ROOM Farmer John sits in a chair that is tapped up with duct tape with springs and cotton sticking out. The living room is messy and there are empty cans of beer all over. Outside the nearby window it is starting to rain and thunder. Farmer John passes out in chair. Moments later he is awaken by the noise of a mooing cow from outside. COW (from outside the window) Moo, moo. FARMER JOHN (half asleep yelling) Shut the fuck up cow! COW Moo, Moo. FARMER JOHN (louder with saliva dripping from his mouth) Shut the fuck up stupid cow before I fucking kill you!! COW Moo,moo. EXT.OUTSIDE SHED-RAIN, THUNDER AND LIGHTNING Farmer John storms to the shed, takes out a rifle and ax and heads toward to the cow. COW (very loud and annoying) Moo, moo, moo.... FARMER JOHN (very angry and stoned with bloodshot eyes) I'll fucking kill you piece of shit! I'll fucking kill you!! As lightning strikes in the back round, Farmer John raises the ax over his head and chops off the cow's head. Blood squirts over his face and clothes as he continues to take pleasure in hacking the cow's head. Soon he simmers down but something deeply disturbs him. The body of the cow continued to move around. Soon the cow's body runs off into the night. An Erie feeling is in the air as John watches the cow disappear into the dark rainy night. FARMER JOHN (whispering to himself) Crazy fucking cow. Farmer John buries the head in the near distance. EXT.FARM HOUSE-NEXT DAY CLOUDY Farmer John stands outside the house and cleans the blood off his ax with a rag. He stops and looks into the distant hills with a curious look on his face. EXT.DISTANT HILLS-SAME DAY The mutated body of the cow runs across the fields and rivers. EXT.NORTH POLL-SANTA'S WORKSHOP-NIGHT Santa on his sleigh with reindeer lands smoothly into the landing strip next to the workshop and cottage. It is a colorful and brightly-lit village with green and red lights decorated with all sorts of Christmas ornaments and trees. Many elves are standing around assisting the landing with special gear. SANTA (cheerfully) Ho, ho, ho. ELF 1 (to Santa) The test run was perfect sir. Suddenly, one of the reindeers attached to the sleigh starts to cough erratically. The animal appears stressed out and weak. SANTA (motioning to the elves) What's all the commotion up there? ELF 2 Something is wrong sir. Santa and three elves move forward to check. They see the sick reindeer laying in the snow as it takes its last struggling breathe and dies in front of them. INT.SANTA'S COTTAGE-LIVING ROOM-SAME NIGHT A blistering fireplace warms the room. Santa and Mrs. Clause sit in separate chairs facing fire. Outside the door many elves are easdropping in on them. SANTA (sadly to his wife) That poor reindeer, he was one of my best. Just then one of the elves listening in from door storms into room. ELF 3 (crying loudly) This is your fault Santa! You pushed that reindeer to hard, you killed him and everyone knows it! Santa gets off his chair, grabs the little elf and slaps him in the face hard. Mrs. Clause stands up and throws her cane to the ground. MRS.CLAUSE (shouting) Don't you ever lay your hands on one of the elves again! CUT TO EXT.TOY FACTORY NEXT DOOR-SAME NIGHT The noise of hammers making toys can be heard echoing. INT.TOY FACTORY Hundreds of little elves sit at long wooden tables busy making toys in an organized fashion like assembly machines. In the eyes we can see that they sense that an argument is taking place next door at Santa's cottage, their eyes motion to it. FADE TO Camera drifts away from factory to the snow covered hills outside. EXT.NEARBY SNOWY HILLS-NIGHT A morbid shadow cast down on the colorful Christmas village. The camera slowly moves and settles on a dark hidden reindeer graveyard with several dozen tombstones. On a small hill in the graveyard rest the fresh loose dirt of its newest victim. Suddenly, from deep in the woods comes a dark figure. It is dark, cold, and foggy out while it walks toward the grave of the reindeer. It is the headless cow. The cow stands over the grave of the dead reindeer like a wolf on a prairie. The cow appeared to be praying. After a few moments of dead silence she begins to dig up the grave and bring the body to the surface. She stands there for a few seconds facing the corpse as if she was bonding with it. EXT.SANTA'S COTTAGE From the window Mrs. Clause looks out the window towards the cemetery almost as if she could sense the commotion. She closes the shade and returns to bed. EXT.REINDEER CEMETERY-SAME NIGHT Lightning strikes above the cemetery grounds and we find the headless cow doing some kind of ritual dance, standing on her two back legs, circling the dead reindeer. The eerie dance continues through the night as the camera fades away. EXT.REINDEER CEMETERY-DAWN The cow stands over the rotted corpse. The bloodshot eyes of the dead reindeer slowly open. The reindeer stands up and the two face each other. They are able to communicate telepathically. REINDEER (V.O) Hello my friend, I know we are strangers now, but you wouldn't be here unless it was meant to be, we have a mission. COW (V.O) Yes. INT.SANTA'S BEDROOM Santa wakes up and smells fresh chocolate chip cookies. He gets out of bed and slips his feet into his monogrammed slippers. INT.KITCHEN Mrs. Clause pulls a tray of cookies from the oven. Santa enters kitchen. SANTA Smells wonderful wife, with a little hot cocoa well have the perfect breakfast. Santa kisses her on the cheek. Santa grabs a few cookies and heads back to the bedroom. Suddenly, there's a ring at the door. MRS.CLAUSE Who could that be this early? INT.FRONT DOOR Mrs. Clause looks through the window and sees nobody outside. She walks away and the doorbell rings again. With a confused look on her face she turns around and heads back to the door. INT.SANTA'S BEDROOM Santa lies in bed eating the cookies. INT.FRONT DOOR Mrs. Clause peeps through the window and sees the dead reindeer standing there. Their eyes meet, the reindeer's eyes filled with hate and hers in terror. She screams and runs away from the door as the dead reindeer comes crashing through the door and storms toward her. The reindeer rams its antlers through her body from behind, breaking her spine and going right through her breast, her eyeballs looked up. She is dead. The headless cow enters and the two glance at the body for a few seconds and then they head towards the bedroom. INT.SANTA'S BEDROOM The deer quietly pokes his head into the bedroom and sees a bulge under the covers. The deer jumps on the bed ready to attack Santa only to find out that the bed was stuffed with pillows. At that moment a clicking sound is heard in the room. The deer turns around and sees Santa aiming a rifle at him. The shot is interrupted and blast into the ceiling when the headless cow attacks him from behind. They roll around struggling on the floor as the reindeer watches with a smile. Santa loses his rifle and the cow lays on top of him, her back hooves press down on him and are embedded in Santa's stomach. The cow spins around and digs her front hooves into his eyes causing his eyeballs and brain to gush all over. EXT.SNOWY MOUNTAINS-DAY The two animals are walking into the mountains. REINDEER (V.O.) You did well today those two got what they deserved, but we have more work to do. I can feel the synergy between us. We will have a good friendship and we will be powerful, more powerful than any fucking human. They continue moving from dusk to dawn over the terrain. They pause for a moment as they hear something in the dark woods. For a brief second it appears to be a creature hiding from them and disappearing into the fields (Creature From story 1 The Silver People) EXT.FARM -EARLY MORNING Farmer John starts up his plow and begins to work on the field. He slowly drives the tractor out with on hand on the wheel and the other on a bottle of moonshine. EXT.FARM-LATE DAY After a long day Farmer John has completed the field, a little drunk he stumbles off the plow and with his blurry vision he sees a figure in the near distance. It is the headless cow. John wipes the sweat from his forehead and begins to walk fast toward the house. Just then, the tractors engines turn on. Farmer John is shocked when he sees the dead reindeer in the seat of the plow. FARMER JOHN (panicking) Holy shit!! The reindeer floors the plow driving it straight towards John mowing him down. The farmer's body is chopped into pieces and his blood splatters across the plow and the field. The two animals stand there looking at the remains. REINDEER (V.O.) We are complete now my friend, we have won. COW (V.O.) No, I'm not complete. Lightning strikes in the near distance as dark clouds move over the sky and heavy rain begins to pour. The storm cast a dark shadow over the two animals. The headless cow attacks the reindeer and drags him down a hill and into a dark pit just outside the field. EXT.FARM AREA-EARLY EVENING The rain has just stopped. The cow comes crawling out of the pit. No longer was she a headless cow now the head of the dead reindeer was attached to her. Rising to the top of a hill the cow proudly stands tall and moos once again. COW (loudly into the night echoing) Moooooo! EXT.LOCAL HOUSE-MORNING A small town cabin house isolated on a quiet dead end street. INT.LOCAL HOUSE KITCHEN Lisa Milford is a middle-aged woman with curly red hair and a very thin body. She has woken early that morning to take her nephew Johnny to the zoo. The two sit at the kitchen table eating eggs, sausage, and toast with orange juice while on a small television set in the kitchen they see a news flash about the local farmer who had been murdered. TV NEWSCASTER(O.C.) We have no witnesses or suspects at this time. This may have been an accident an accident. The police say that the community is in no danger and to be please be patient with the investigation. EXT.LOCAL HOUSE Lisa and Johnny hop into a beat up old station wagon and take off for the zoo. EXT.FARM ROAD-SAME MORNING Driving down the road, Lisa glances into the fields on the side and gets an eerie feeling that many eyes are watching her. In the fields a slight glance of eyes watching flash for a split second. EXT.LOCAL POLICE STATION-LATER THAT DAY Several police cars pull into the station parking lot as the building is very active this day. INT.LOCAL POLICE STATION LAB A young clean- detective with black greased back hair is speaking with a forensic scientist. SCIENTIST No fingerprints were on the tractor, but something unusual was found, animal hairs and tissue. DETECTIVE WILLIAMS (surprised) Animal hairs? What kind of animal? SCIENTIST Unknown right now, a complete analysis of the hair samples and tissue will take several days (brief pause) as usual. The two look at each other sarcastically, referring to the last comment. INT.DETECTIVES OFFICE-SAME DAY Frustrated, Detective William returns to his desk and sips a cup of hot black coffee. He stairs out the window thinking heavily. Next, he logs onto the police web site on his PC. He does a search for keyword "Animal Cults" and several hundred links spring up, he begins scrolling down the list. EXT.COUNTRY ROAD OUTSIDE OF TOWN-SAME DAY Police officer Giannone, a fat cop with glasses and a mustache, very nerdy looking is patrolling in his squad car down the road. Suddenly his car swerves to avoid hitting two animals in the middle of the road. Dazed and confused the officer slowly steps out of the car. It is the headless cow and dead reindeer. There is complete silence as the all stared at each other. The cop stumbles back to his car gets and picks up his radio. OFFICER GIANNONE (nervously speaking into CB) Listen, I need back up now on Old Miller Road South, I'm not crazy, there are two intelligent animals here staring at me, a cow and a reindeer wearing each other's heads. INT.POLICE STATION DETECTIVE OFFICE After hearing news about the animals on road over his radio Detective William's grabs his overcoat and flies out the door. EXT.COUNTRY ROAD Officer Giannone puts his radio down and turns around to find that the two crazed animals are longer there. He draws his gun and begins to look around. After walking a few dozen feet he pauses when in the distance he hears the sound of his patrol cars engines starting. OFFICER GIANNONE (whispering to himself) What the hell? His eyes are shocked in disbelief when he sees the squad car heading towards him being driven by the bloody cow and the reindeer in the passenger seat. They floor the gas and run over him. His head is cracked open, all of his bones are crushed while blood splatters all over the hood. EXT.FOREST AREA A few miles away a bold mildly retarded timber jack in a flannel shirt, baseball cap and overall jeans is chopping down a tree with an ax. TIMBER JACK (while chopping tree) Poor old Farmer John. The police car comes spinning down to the sight, the cow loses control of the vehicle and crashes it into the tree. TIMBER JACK (stupidly) Oh, oh, I'm in trouble now. Hey, you guys allright? The animals climb out of the car. TIMBER JACK (shocked) Holy shit!! The timber jack swings his ax and manages to chop off the cow's implanted deer head returning her to a headless cow. The dead reindeer heads back to the car to get a rifle. The cow jumps on top of the lumberjack. After a brief struggle the cow sticks her hooves into his eyes. Almost dead now he lies on the ground rolling around blindly crying for his mommy. The dead reindeer approaches to finish him off. The dead reindeer cloaks the rifle, sticks it into his mouth and blows his gums and teeth straight out the back of his head. The sound of police sirens is heard in the distance. REINDEER(V.O.) We must run now. The two animals take off into the fields. EXT.OLD COUNTRY ROAD Many marked and unmarked police cars are parked at the murder scene of Officer Giannone. On one knee Detective Williams kneels over the remains and shakes his head in disgust and anger. COP 1 It must be a serial killer, right detective? DETECTIVE WILLIAMS I don't think this is the work of a human. Detective Williams looks into the fields nearby and gets the same funny feeling that Lisa felt that morning that something was out there watching. A faint presence of dark hidden figures is seen in the crops as the wind blows. Just then a message comes over the radio. RADIO VOICE(O.S.) We found the patrol car and another body!! The detective takes off in an unmarked car. EXT.COUNTRY ROAD NEARBY-EARLY EVENING Lisa and her nephew Johnny are driving back from the zoo. Driving in the lane next to them is a man with a green coat and hat, his face hidden. Lisa is disturbed by his constant staring at them. She continuously tries to ignore him as he continues to drive his car besides her. Then she glanced over again and noticed that she could not see his hands on the wheel just the jacket sleeves seemed to be there. He turns to look at her, a white dirty badly scared dead looking face grins at her. She slows her car down to avoid him, hoping he passes her. He cuts them off and passes. Lisa lets out a sigh of relief. Little Johnny lies in the back seat sleeping unaware of the slight fright she had seen. A few moments later she sees the stranger's car on the side of the road up ahead. With her eyes almost closed she began to pass, the man in the green coat was nowhere to be seen. Not paying to much attention to the road she is suddenly shocked to see the headless cow and dead reindeer in the middle of the road. Her car rams into the headless cow, it's fat body lands on the hood and is taken for a ride. Lisa swerves the car back and forth, blinded by the cow's immense body. The cow manages to get close to the windshield and smashes her hoof through it. Screaming in terror, her mouth wide open she is suddenly silenced when the cow's hoof is rammed into her mouth going straight through her head. Little Johnny in the back seat suddenly awakens as his aunt's brain lands on the seat next to him. The car spins out of control, flips over, and explodes into an immense fireball. The deer races down the street to the deadly scene and the man in the green coat walks away with a limp in his walk. INT.DETECTIVE OFFICE-NEXT DAY Detective Williams sits at his desk looking at various paperwork and photos on animal cults. He comes across a disturbing picture. It shows a headless ox hanging from a rope over a fire with several headless human bodies surrounding it. Just then the phone rings. He picks it up slowly. DETECTIVE WILLIAMS (annoyed) Detective Wiliams. STRANGE VOICE (O.C.) Were back again fucker. DETECTIVE WILLIAMS What? Hello, who is this? There is no response and the line goes dead. From the next office the sargeant is shouting.
Copyright © 2003 Chris Hofmann |